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Old 06-17-2013, 04:40 PM   #20
RozZy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Joe's Dad View Post
Good job.. lol

Then take out all those cliches and stereotype scenes of your story. Use themes of today. Why make a film of the 1800's? where are you going to get the clothing to be 'period correct'?

And how in the heck did come up with the names 'Wakhan' and 'Mankato'? Do you know the meaning of the word 'Wakan' in Lakota? Have you given any thought in your desire to tell the world on the problems of the Natives in North America, you may be offending the same people you wish to help?


Your film script reads like a conglomeration of every romantic book and film ever made. Your story sounds like every story written by non-Indians that has a wolf in it, a dream catcher on the wall, Natives in leather fringe, Red Deer Table, blah, blah, blah.

Have you heard of Jim Chee?

This is what you wrote:

I'd love to hear about any ideas you might have about changes!

Your story needs change. My words are written as constructive, not destructive. May they get to your eyes in the same manner.
They're constructive now and I thank you for that. I wish I hadn't posted that story yet since I'm not even at the script stage yet.
I do take in constructive criticism and I can only Imagine how it would be for someone from another culture of mine doing a film about Persians and getting it wrong. I would react the same way, but I would also start helping the person to get it right.

Yes lets make it contemporary. What problems would you want the film to bring up?
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