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Old 07-24-2016, 04:13 PM   #21
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I have not personally done anything to earn an eagle feather, have not even formally received a name. If I ever do, it will probably be "Runs His Mouth". If any feathers were ever passed down, I don't know where they ended up. The only ones I have ever held in my hand, I didn't have for long. And it is probably my own fault that I never see the bigger picture. I am not very observant. So I guess I should quit my whining and go out and live life maybe? LOL
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Old 07-26-2016, 04:00 AM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OLChemist View Post
When I was in college --broke, without a car, in a really small town, in a dry county, in rural east TN -- I decided one Saturday to 'liberate' some stale loaves of bread from the cafeteria, to go to the "lake" in the "city" park and feed the ducks. There were lots of ducks of various types, a few dozen geese and a pair of swans in this fairly small pond. What I did not know was these animals were quite accustomed to being fed. They could recognize a Wonder Bread bag at 100 yards.

I stepped off the bike path with my Wonder bread bags and they started coming. Lots of them. I stopped in surprise and the lead duck began to run. All hell broke loose. The rest of the flock began running. The ducks swarmed over my feet, pecking at my shoes and legs.

I should, at this point, mention I had very unfortunate fashion sense as a college student, along with a certain fascination for -- well, uh -- 1980's reproductions of 1960's hippie clothing. I was also a handweaver, so I had lots handwoven open topped "hippie purses", to match -- as well as they could -- any outfit. I was attired in my prized (too big) broomstick skirt and carrying one of my purses.

Back to the flock, the geese brought up the rear. They were tall enough seize the bread bags and tear them from my hands. Within a few seconds the bread was on the ground and waterfowl were fighting all around me. Then it was gone.

For ten seconds the entire gaggle looked at me. A huge gander, with the wing span of a pterodactyl, decided I had to be hiding bread in my purse. The tug of war lasted until a evil eyed goose, with the same melodious cry as a buzz saw on concrete, gave me a good solid peck on the posterior, pulling down the waistband of my skirt in the process. I was now displaying my unmentionables to downtown. I let go of the purse and grabbed my skirt.

They riffled my fallen purse! My college id, my dorm keys, my driver's license, kleenexes, loose change... all over the ground. A mallard crawled completely inside to hunt for crumbs and relieve himself. Don't let those webbed feet fool you! I got my hand clawed by their sharp little toenails while grabbing back my driver's license. The entire time that same goose stayed behind me, yanking on my skirt, forcing me to hang on to my waistband with one hand.

Until this point the swans had been placidly swimming around the lake. When I glanced up from the fray, they were majestically unfolding their legs and clambering ashore. I'm 5' 8". Those birds came to my collarbone. I was not staying to see what they would do when they found out the bread was gone!

Feeding the birds cost me $30 in lost key and id fees, LOL.
That story needed a spew alert because I nearly spewed coffee all over my laptop. When I was a kid, and we were on the beach, tourists would ask us if we wanted to feed the seagulls with them. We would politely decline, and then get as far away from them as possible. Massing seagulls produce lots of seagull doodoo. I've seen people feed them from their cars, and then freak out big time when the gulls flew into their cars in search of more bread. Once, ti took some people over an hour to get the birds out of their car.

Niigig, it's nice to see someone young like you asking questions and wanting to learn. You accept things well, even if they are what you don't want to hear. That's a very good start. I would also be willing to bet that the majority of people on this forum did not see the bigger picture either when we were your age-I know I didn't. It takes time, life experience, and patience.
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Last edited by subeeds; 07-26-2016 at 04:03 AM..
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Old 07-26-2016, 06:11 PM   #23
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Omg that reminds me of one time a few years ago, I think I was 10, I was riding bikes with my brother and our friends and this one kid who was really arrogant and kind of a bully. We went to DQ and got ice cream. This bully ordered a medium oreo blizzard. He was making fun of the rest of us because we each only had enough money for smaller stuff like dilly bars and while he was focused on us (not looking at his ice cream) a seagull swooped down and took a big dump into his oreo blizzard. He did not notice and nobody said anything. He ate the blizzard and complained once that it tasted slimy and weird but finished the whole thing. One major con of ordering a dessert that happens to look like bird poop.

Looking back on it, I feel bad for not saying anything, but at the same time it was funny because he was such a mean kid.
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Old 07-27-2016, 01:15 AM   #24
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And that, my dear is what is known as karma. LOL! It's not like he was eating rat poison or something, in which case I hope someone would have warned him.
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