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-   -   Natives dating/marrying non-natives (http://forums.powwows.com/f26/natives-dating-marrying-non-natives-28763/)

mikki_mono 08-22-2005 11:59 AM

Natives dating/marrying non-natives
 
This is an issue that some friends and I were discussing one day. There's someone we all know that's dating a non-native who has ancestory and can prove the documents but's wait on the approvial from the tribe on gettting their card. But anyway the issue that's arrised is non-natives family is kind of scared about how the others family might act when they find out and what they might think.
My question out there is what is everyones oppinion on Natives dating/marrying non-natives?

badmaninc 08-22-2005 12:36 PM

We just did this topic about a month or two ago. It was actually a pretty good thread. Go back and look for it, its worth the read. I would but can't remember what the thread was.

~pathwalker~ 08-22-2005 01:08 PM

Marry who you love, thats the only way marrige works.

50cal 08-22-2005 03:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ~pathwalker~
Marry who you love, as long as they are native.

PW- So true........*L*

WocusWoman 08-22-2005 03:43 PM

Personally I'm against it for myself and my brood, but I refuse to cut myself off from family or friends that choose to go non-native.

*Brown Eyed Gurl* 08-23-2005 05:07 PM

If i have to be a ..err...gramdmother...id prefer little Sto:lo ndn grandbabies....i USED to be one of those ppl that said u love who u love but not anymore...my ppl are less and less and thats just scary.

MayChe 08-23-2005 07:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ~pathwalker~
Marry who you love, thats the only way marrige works.


So right you are...

OklahomaBella 08-23-2005 08:15 PM

We are given the choice of living with freewill, the opportunity to choose. We love who we love, we cherish who we cherish. It goes back to the thought that regardless of race, creed, color and/or tribe *wink*, we all make our choices. So can we say that when it comes to love, true blinding love...it's all good only if??... HE loves us all, so why would "we" need to choose or be picky??

And of course that is just my $.02, LOL

badmaninc 08-24-2005 03:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ~pathwalker~
Marry who you love, thats the only way marrige works.

If you can't marry for love at least make sure the other person is wealthy and wants to take care of you financially. That way you could go to powwows every weekend.

mikki_mono 08-24-2005 09:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by badmaninc
If you can't marry for love at least make sure the other person is wealthy and wants to take care of you financially. That way you could go to powwows every weekend.

Love that one. We really didnt think about that and you are very true.

Nezbah 08-24-2005 12:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by badmaninc
If you can't marry for love at least make sure the other person is wealthy and wants to take care of you financially. That way you could go to powwows every weekend.


LMAOH..... goot one bad. Andddddd, go to powwows without him/her.....aye. Personally, I want to keep in the blood lines. If not with another dine' than another tribe. With Navajo quantums at 1/4 to be 'legal' then i'd rather have my kids be more than that (preferrably fullblood). But that's just me and my personal beliefs. To each his own....

~pathwalker~ 08-24-2005 12:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 50cal
PW- So true........*L*

LMAO! I ALMOST missed what ya did, but I saw it! You so cwazy!

Blackbear 08-24-2005 04:10 PM

If my mom hadnt married a non native I would'nt be here and one of my goals for a mate was a full blood from my own people.. and I married a mixed blood osage who I would'nt trade for the world. I cannot fathom meeting someone that would love or treat me better than him. Now my kid will have to marry someone at least 1/4 tuscarora for her kids to be recognized, and she will be encouraged to marry a tuscarora, but at least she has several young boys her age back home she is'nt related to unlike myself. (LOL I got one picked out for her too!)

geronimo 08-24-2005 05:37 PM

Blackbear, I guess parents are always trying to determine who comes into their family! J/K! Down here, a potential mate's entire extended family is dissected and talked about and then he/she's determined 1suitable OR 2"their people are foolish, stay away from them" :)


Again, this is my personal take on all of this.........

I was brought up to marry within my race and, if possible, my tribe. My family would accept me marrying outside my race but they'd prefer a Lumbee guy. We're out here fighting tooth and nail for "All Things NDN" every day & I want it to be "continued returns" for many future generations. Not for us to die out in a couple hundred years & all our struggles, successes, etc. to have been in vain.


Now, I can't speak for all you girls representing other tribes........
But, all our Lumbee men out there need to step up their game and come correct so we women won't have to marry white men!!!!!!!!!
I'm tired of searching for a good Indian man.
:soapbox: :soapbox:

urbanskinz 08-24-2005 08:47 PM

I'm the result ofa Kahnawake Woman marrying an Italian Man, I married a beautiful Taino Woman from Dominican Republic. Quisqeya I believe is the spelling.
Marry for LOVE not Blood Quantum!


O:nen ki' wahi'

Blackbear 08-24-2005 10:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by geronimo

Now, I can't speak for all you girls representing other tribes........
But, all our Lumbee men out there need to step up their game and come correct so we women won't have to marry white men!!!!!!!!!
I'm tired of searching for a good Indian man.
:soapbox: :soapbox:

Men in general need to step up their game ROFLMAO! (just kidding guys ... or am I?)
Now I just have a hard time believing you southern gals don't know the use of good cast iron skillet.. if they dont' step up their game all their own, (remember they got southern mammas that do things FOR them!) You gotta use that skillet to break that cycle of misuse and MAKE them step up their game or the only women they will ever know IS mamma! LOL!!

1badazzndn 08-25-2005 12:11 PM

I know a lot of ndn girls who married/got with non-native guys simply because the guys from the rez have no goals or motivation and they had drug/alcohol problems, not into their culture, etc. Its a cycle in ndn communities. I must agree with geronimo and blackbear that the guys need to step up. I dont have any grudges or look down upon any native who does marry outside. Personally I dont want to marry anybody but a native, thats just to keep my beliefs and tradition. Its a lot easier to get kids motivated into their culture when both the parents are involved. but it isnt necessary, because it can continue. Love doesnt have any color, but i believe RED is the closest for me!!!

geronimo 08-25-2005 01:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blackbear
Men in general need to step up their game ROFLMAO! (just kidding guys ... or am I?)
Now I just have a hard time believing you southern gals don't know the use of good cast iron skillet.. if they dont' step up their game all their own, (remember they got southern mammas that do things FOR them!) You gotta use that skillet to break that cycle of misuse and MAKE them step up their game or the only women they will ever know IS mamma! LOL!!


Tell me about it! Where would the world be w/o us women?! But, LOTS of our people baby their sons. And then that translates into wives catering to their husbands. Even my grandma bows down to my granddaddy! I WILL break the cycle! Yeah, I might even have to break bad & use a "spider"/skillet on them! That's why I've got to find a man that I love, 1st & foremost, but then he's got to be NDN, independent, into equal partnerships, etc....:):):):) Like I said, men, step yo' game up!

What kills me is when our men marry white women and treat them like gold & become all subservient when they expect to treat our women like dirt and get away w/it!

1badazzndn 08-25-2005 01:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by geronimo
Tell me about it! Where would the world be w/o us women?! But, LOTS of our people baby their sons. And then that translates into wives catering to their husbands. Even my grandma bows down to my granddaddy! I WILL break the cycle! Yeah, I might even have to break bad & use a "spider"/skillet on them! That's why I've got to find a man that I love, 1st & foremost, but then he's got to be NDN, independent, into equal partnerships, etc....:):):):) Like I said, men, step yo' game up!

What kills me is when our men marry white women and treat them like gold & become all subservient when they expect to treat our women like dirt and get away w/it!


Hey geronimo. Me n my drum group set up at the Spring Lumbee Powwow this past May. All I can say dayum!!! lumbee women are off tha hook! There aint no way I would treat any ndn girl bad, especially Lumbee!!!!

geronimo 08-25-2005 03:32 PM

Gracias
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by 1badazzndn
Hey geronimo. Me n my drum group set up at the Spring Lumbee Powwow this past May. All I can say dayum!!! lumbee women are off tha hook! There aint no way I would treat any ndn girl bad, especially Lumbee!!!!


Our guys need to get a clue from you then.........
Glad you had a good time in Rob Co.! :eyepop: :naughty2:


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