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Foxmoon 06-30-2007 03:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by APACHEFIRE (Post 941895)
.... sheesh, i have to time this better. most of you have left for the day while im just getting on! thats me, always out of step. **laughing** FOXMOON, wow, that stinks that you have to hide your money from your own daughter in your own home! just how young is she? i have a daughter 19 and son 20. they dont live with me :cry_smile and i miss them big time! hope things turn around for you soon!

In 5 weeks she will be 18 years old! But she thinks shes 25 or something.

APACHEFIRE 07-01-2007 12:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by w30 (Post 941927)
That avy is from that vampire movie LOL

**laughing** well that explains it. i dont watch t.v. much, and i rarely go to the movies. like, i average less than once a year! and if you ask my children, i dont know any movies from dvd's or videos cos i always fall asleep while watching them!**laughing** p.s. you have a great avy too. i sure wish i could get one.

APACHEFIRE 07-01-2007 12:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Foxmoon (Post 941938)
In 5 weeks she will be 18 years old! But she thinks shes 25 or something.

i hear its a mother daughter thing. and she is supposed to outgrow it.i get along really well with my son. always have. but the day my daughter hit 13,BLAM! i was in the dog house. of course i did something terribly unforgiveable at the time....well, at least now she and i seem to be getting along better since my trip out there a few weeks ago for her graduation/AA degree. my children grew up knowing we didnt have alot of money,thanks to my 'ex'. once my daughter graduated early from high school, she got a job. same for my son. they know they have to save in order to pay for college and other things. i wish they didnt have to.

Ginger 07-01-2007 12:48 AM

I have a problem with my 14 yr old every now & then he thinks he can get all bossy with me & I set him straight with a good ols wack! I don't put up with shi t I'll smack them

APACHEFIRE 07-01-2007 01:33 AM

Doing The Opposite Of My Family....
 
sorry, double post.

APACHEFIRE 07-01-2007 01:41 AM

Doing The Opposite Of My Family....
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Ginger (Post 942080)
I have a problem with my 14 yr old every now & then he thinks he can get all bossy with me & I set him straight with a good ols wack! I don't put up with shi t I'll smack them

well yes, i punished them if they got out of line. but i really tried never to 'hit' them. thats especially not good when filled with anger. (i didnt want to teach them that its ok to 'hit'. or that violence is the answer). they had lots of privilages they lost if they had to be punished. or could have when things went well(positive reinforcement). the ones they had already 'earned', stayed(like going to the park or swimming). the other privilages came from their learning and doing things positive over a period of time(brushing teeth,keeping room clean). i learned to say, 'i will try my best', in case something happened so i could not follow through right away on positive privilages.(always keep your word). when they got older, and could understand,i just told them how what they did or said, made me feel(no put downs though). then discussed what could have been said or done differently(end with a smile and hug).i still use that one. i learned all this from my own childhood.most important, children of all ages need our love. they need self-esteem. they need our acceptance. they learn what WE teach them, not just with our words, but by our actions. p.s.if you make a mistake,apologize. my mother never would....

Singing Otter 07-01-2007 02:11 AM

Mom and dad spanked us but one thing I remember mom telling me about dad was that he said this.... never ever spank/hit while you're angry... you can really hurt someone with that. Not just physically but mentally.

I remember mom's stories about one of grandpa's girlfriends sitting on her and beating her. She said that her hip popped and she had problems out of it ever since. Her dad found out and did something about it.... but it wasn't until many beatings later.

Foxmoon 07-01-2007 08:50 AM

Thank you all for sharing your stories about yours or families lives with me. I never had to spank eigther of my children we do the take away and reward system until my daughter hit 16 and she pushed me real hard and knocked me up against the tv stand well I have 9 herniated dics in my neck middle back & lower back so it really put me in the bed for 2 weeks but not before I was able to still turn her over my knee and spank her while explaining and eye for an eye theory! I told her when she gets out in the real world some wont love her most wont and wont put up with that crap and they would knock the chit right out of her. My hubby has had her drop him to the ground after she has kneed him in the groone area and has pushed hit spacked him and cause he didnt do anything but talked to her she still disrespects him to this day!!!!!!!!!! She told me I dont mess with you much cuase I know you will mess me up. But before I turn 18 I am going to beat the piss out of Dad with a fry pan. That scares the crap out of me. We are on edge all the time we only have 5 weeks left before her B-day.

APACHEFIRE 07-01-2007 06:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Foxmoon (Post 942113)
Thank you all for sharing your stories about yours or families lives with me. I never had to spank eigther of my children we do the take away and reward system until my daughter hit 16 and she pushed me real hard and knocked me up against the tv stand well I have 9 herniated dics in my neck middle back & lower back so it really put me in the bed for 2 weeks but not before I was able to still turn her over my knee and spank her while explaining and eye for an eye theory! I told her when she gets out in the real world some wont love her most wont and wont put up with that crap and they would knock the chit right out of her. My hubby has had her drop him to the ground after she has kneed him in the groone area and has pushed hit spacked him and cause he didnt do anything but talked to her she still disrespects him to this day!!!!!!!!!! She told me I dont mess with you much cuase I know you will mess me up. But before I turn 18 I am going to beat the piss out of Dad with a fry pan. That scares the crap out of me. We are on edge all the time we only have 5 weeks left before her B-day.

dang FOXMOON! sounds like your daughter should have been in some kind of anger management group! its still not too late. especially if you have records of her 'parent abuse'. i dont know much about the program TOUGH LOVE,but your daughter sounds like a good candidate for it. a family should not have to fear their own children. just as children should not have to fear their family. right now, i fear for you and your husband, as well as your daughter. what you all are going through should be taken care of NOW! it really does sound like what ever problems she is having, should have been taken care of years ago. dont be afraid to go to your local health department for help. they should steer you to the right place. PLEASE, dont wait until it IS too late. warm hugs woman. keeping your family in my prayers....

Singing Otter 07-01-2007 09:47 PM

Wrong but kinda funny...
 
http://i26.photobucket.com/albums/c1...heatorange.gif

Ginger 07-01-2007 10:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by APACHEFIRE (Post 942083)
well yes, i punished them if they got out of line. but i really tried never to 'hit' them. thats especially not good when filled with anger. (i didnt want to teach them that its ok to 'hit'. or that violence is the answer). they had lots of privilages they lost if they had to be punished. or could have when things went well(positive reinforcement). the ones they had already 'earned', stayed(like going to the park or swimming). the other privilages came from their learning and doing things positive over a period of time(brushing teeth,keeping room clean). i learned to say, 'i will try my best', in case something happened so i could not follow through right away on positive privilages.(always keep your word). when they got older, and could understand,i just told them how what they did or said, made me feel(no put downs though). then discussed what could have been said or done differently(end with a smile and hug).i still use that one. i learned all this from my own childhood.most important, children of all ages need our love. they need self-esteem. they need our acceptance. they learn what WE teach them, not just with our words, but by our actions. p.s.if you make a mistake,apologize. my mother never would....

Ioh I don't ever hit them when I'm angry I but my self in a time out & thenI say come here thenI'll pop them on the azz & I do take away their things like phones tv games, & hanging out with thir friends as the worse punisment possable I could do to them.

Joe's Dad 07-01-2007 11:02 PM

I have 3 children and I spanked each one of them when they were young. The oldest one raised her hand to her mother one time, but I 'interfered'. Everything they received was earned. There were no freebies in our house. I always talked to my children. There was a tacit understanding that there would be NO disrespecting of elders, including their parents. Their mother and I divorced because we did not agree on how to raise children.

My oldest is going to be 32 next month. She still calls me when she needs advice with her child. My middle daughter is 25. Wasn't too long ago that she called and said that her and her sister were talking about their childhood. She told me, "Dad, we are glad that you were our father". My son will soon be 20. He is my best friend. (When he was small, he said I was his best 'old' friend.LOL) He is going to college and works full-time.

I was raised by the proverbial 'village'. My brother and I were raised by all our extended family. Old Style.

NOTE: If my child ever threatened her parents with a frying pan, it would be an absolute positive that she would be growing that arm out of her ear.

Joe's Dad 07-01-2007 11:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Foxmoon (Post 942113)
Thank you all for sharing your stories about yours or families lives with me. I never had to spank eigther of my children we do the take away and reward system until my daughter hit 16 and she pushed me real hard and knocked me up against the tv stand well I have 9 herniated dics in my neck middle back & lower back so it really put me in the bed for 2 weeks but not before I was able to still turn her over my knee and spank her while explaining and eye for an eye theory! I told her when she gets out in the real world some wont love her most wont and wont put up with that crap and they would knock the chit right out of her. My hubby has had her drop him to the ground after she has kneed him in the groone area and has pushed hit spacked him and cause he didnt do anything but talked to her she still disrespects him to this day!!!!!!!!!! She told me I dont mess with you much cuase I know you will mess me up. But before I turn 18 I am going to beat the piss out of Dad with a fry pan. That scares the crap out of me. We are on edge all the time we only have 5 weeks left before her B-day.

Typos can lead to perverted imaginations!!!:hysterica

APACHEFIRE 07-02-2007 01:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joe's Dad (Post 942192)
I have 3 children and I spanked each one of them when they were young. The oldest one raised her hand to her mother one time, but I 'interfered'. Everything they received was earned. There were no freebies in our house. I always talked to my children. There was a tacit understanding that there would be NO disrespecting of elders, including their parents. Their mother and I divorced because we did not agree on how to raise children.

My oldest is going to be 32 next month. She still calls me when she needs advice with her child. My middle daughter is 25. Wasn't too long ago that she called and said that her and her sister were talking about their childhood. She told me, "Dad, we are glad that you were our father". My son will soon be 20. He is my best friend. (When he was small, he said I was his best 'old' friend.LOL) He is going to college and works full-time.

I was raised by the proverbial 'village'. My brother and I were raised by all our extended family. Old Style.

NOTE: If my child ever threatened her parents with a frying pan, it would be an absolute positive that she would be growing that arm out of her ear.

....you sound like a great dad. old style is good. i wish i had had the 'village' to help me, my 'ex' is like yours....

Singing Otter 07-02-2007 02:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joe's Dad (Post 942195)
Typos can lead to perverted imaginations!!!:hysterica

OMG :lol: I totally missed that! Siiiiiiiiiick dude! lol

w30 07-02-2007 04:30 AM

I didn't get spanked or hit when I was a little kid but, I remember one time when I was a teenager cussing at my daddy an it was in front of my friends ...
He backhanded me so hard my head put a dent in the wall,my friends got sent home an then I had to go buy the stuff to fix the wall an fix it !
Thats the first an last time I remember him ever hitting me but,they was just some things he didnt put up with an me disrespecting him like that was one of them !

w30 07-02-2007 04:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by APACHEFIRE (Post 942078)
**laughing** well that explains it. i dont watch t.v. much, and i rarely go to the movies. like, i average less than once a year! and if you ask my children, i dont know any movies from dvd's or videos cos i always fall asleep while watching them!**laughing** p.s. you have a great avy too. i sure wish i could get one.

Thanks !

whitewave 07-02-2007 12:44 PM

Good morning friends!

Singing Otter 07-02-2007 12:55 PM

Monday's suck.

outershell 07-02-2007 01:16 PM

"look at us, we're beautiful
all the people push and pull
but, they'll never get inside
we've got too much to hide"

~ song lyrics Moby


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