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Old 03-07-2016, 09:56 AM   #1
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Hosting young girl in rez

Hey!

I'm half Lakota/Dakota native american, currently living in France. I'm 18 years old, and at a point in my life where I really feel the need to explore my ancestry and learn more about my culture.


I don't know if this is the appropriate forum or way to ask, but I really need to at least give it a shot.

I would like to know if someone living in a rez, with traditional values, would be willing to maybe host me or teach me more about my culture. After years of struggling, I'm at a point where I really need to come back to where I come from and reconnect with everything.

I don't have any dates set up yet, but I really need to connect to my origins. And I hope I'll be able to find someone willing to help me through this!

I'm sorry if this is kinda weird, and I'm sorry if it's the wrong place for asking this.

Thank you so much.
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Old 03-07-2016, 10:15 AM   #2
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Oh, be careful. You have no way of knowing who is going to respond. The internet is not a safe place.
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Old 03-07-2016, 10:36 AM   #3
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Is there any form of exchange program you could look into? It may be safer at least if you go through a reputable organization.
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Old 03-07-2016, 11:09 AM   #4
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If, as you have told us, you are in contact with your Oglala family then you have relatives. Contact them. They will have or know people who might teach you. (You'll need them, anyway. Almost any undertaking in Lakota life requires the assistance of your kin.)

This is also far more likely to yield the results you want, than is reaching out to strangers on the internet. At best, you're likely to get some pay to pray type who will sell you some quick fix "spiritual" dope. At worst, you'll find yourself a predator.

I confess your request really bothers me. If I had a daughter, I'd metaphorically wring her neck for putting something like this out on the 'net. Since you want to learn about Native life, let me give you some statistics: We live with a lovely legacy of colonial, sexual violence. One in three Native women in the US will be a victim of rape in their lifetimes. The numbers in Canada aren't that different, 1 in 4. You're a Native woman; this is you and your sisters.

The innocence and invulnerability of youth is all well and good, but let's try to keep the innocence intact. Please don't let your desire connect blunt your judgement.

Last edited by OLChemist; 03-07-2016 at 06:19 PM..
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Old 03-07-2016, 07:18 PM   #5
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why A rez and not YOUR rez?

we have a huge population of lakota in denver that can help you out.....but that would only give you the city indian experience

be careful.....we have some of the best people in the world here in the USA.....and unfortunately some of the worst
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Old 03-08-2016, 07:01 PM   #6
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Old 03-08-2016, 10:36 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NahimanaSung View Post
Hey!

I'm half Lakota/Dakota native american, currently living in France. I'm 18 years old, and at a point in my life where I really feel the need to explore my ancestry and learn more about my culture.


I don't know if this is the appropriate forum or way to ask, but I really need to at least give it a shot.

I would like to know if someone living in a rez, with traditional values, would be willing to maybe host me or teach me more about my culture. After years of struggling, I'm at a point where I really need to come back to where I come from and reconnect with everything.

I don't have any dates set up yet, but I really need to connect to my origins. And I hope I'll be able to find someone willing to help me through this!

I'm sorry if this is kinda weird, and I'm sorry if it's the wrong place for asking this.

Thank you so much.
Which half? Mom or dad? What's the name?

Do you REALLY want to connect with family, or are you trying to find a hot young NDN to fulfill you romantic fantasy?
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Old 03-09-2016, 02:53 AM   #8
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Now I remember...you posted before said you had an uncle and some cousins. Were you able to contact any family over here?
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Old 03-09-2016, 04:23 AM   #9
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Oh My Goodness!!!

I need to echo the cautionary sentiments already expressed here! What you have asked and are looking to do is very dangerous.

I've seen crime reports on the local news that it is not safe to meet someone (a stranger off the internet) to buy something off of Craigslist, even when it was arranged to conduct the purchase in front of a Police Station! (There's even a start up business in my area now to rent a bodyguard for protection for Craigslist purchases!)

Used to be, on our rez, when I was growing up & up to a few years ago, we didn't lock our house; most people didn't, even when we/you weren't home or at night. It wasn't the NDN way.

Nowadays, it's different....a few yrs. ago, I'm sad to say that we had to put in a screen door with a lock on my mom's house. It is safer so when you answer & open the front door you have some protection that someone can't attack you. It's a different world now.
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Old 03-09-2016, 01:01 PM   #10
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I have to say I'm very shocked by gilisi's comments. I do not have any "romantic fantasy" nor am looking for a "young hot guy", and I find it very offensive for you to assume something like that about myself.


I did not succeed in getting in touch with my relatives from there. I've sent them emails but nothing has returned, I don't even know if they still live on the rez or not. Their names are Barnett, Nicholson, and Reville.


However, I'm grateful for some of the informations some of you have given me, about how unsafe it is to go there alone. So, thank you.


I do not feel welcome at all on this forum, I don't think I'll keep posting. Thank you for those who have taught me things and tried to help. You can still contact me via private messages if you want to talk about something. Thank you.
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Old 03-09-2016, 01:42 PM   #11
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I have to say I'm very shocked by gilisi's comments. I do not have any "romantic fantasy" nor am looking for a "young hot guy", and I find it very offensive for you to assume something like that about myself.


I did not succeed in getting in touch with my relatives from there. I've sent them emails but nothing has returned, I don't even know if they still live on the rez or not. Their names are Barnett, Nicholson, and Reville.


However, I'm grateful for some of the informations some of you have given me, about how unsafe it is to go there alone. So, thank you.


I do not feel welcome at all on this forum, I don't think I'll keep posting. Thank you for those who have taught me things and tried to help. You can still contact me via private messages if you want to talk about something. Thank you.
You are obviously young and very naive ! What he said is very common ! Young folks from foreign countries hear stories about the noble red man ! You , as most young people these days , are ready to jump up and down , being offended. Maybe you should realize the reality. If your feelings are hurt , I'm sorry , but the truth is just as he said. As ndn people in this country we deal with this everyday.ESPECIALLY from folks from other countries !

Don't give up your quest , just be very cautious.

Again , to be very honest , we sympathize with your situation , and most are glad you have joined us on this forum. I hope you are able to learn , but really.......we don't REALLY care if you get all butt hurt over our comments !
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Old 03-09-2016, 01:51 PM   #12
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You are obviously young and very naive ! What he said is very common ! Young folks from foreign countries hear stories about the noble red man ! You , as most young people these days , are ready to jump up and down , being offended. Maybe you should realize the reality. If your feelings are hurt , I'm sorry , but the truth is just as he said. As ndn people in this country we deal with this everyday.ESPECIALLY from folks from other countries !

Don't give up your quest , just be very cautious.

Again , to be very honest , we sympathize with your situation , and most are glad you have joined us on this forum. I hope you are able to learn , but really.......we don't REALLY care if you get all butt hurt over our comments !

I do know I'm young, and still have a lot to learn. I haven't been hurt at all by the recommandations and precautions to take, I am very grateful that I've been warned of that. I've just been a bit offended because I felt like I wasn't taken very seriously. But I do understand that you must receive a lot of people from other countries having those fantaisies, I just found it a bit disrespectful to assume straight ahead that I was part of them.

But hey, it's not a big deal, and I'm glad to read that you are all, in fact, sympathizing with my situation.

To clarify and explain a bit to you all: I have a very difficult family history. As all families do, I guess. But I've been kept away from my people for a long, long time, and childhood wounds are starting to get open again. Always been considered and felt as a foreigner here in France, and my wish to go and meet other people from my tribe is not a simple fantasy of "the nature connected indian" or any blabber like that.


My first post was really naive, I realize that now. I'm willing to learn what I should have learned years ago but couldn't because of all that mess. So thank you.
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Old 03-09-2016, 02:46 PM   #13
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Let me give you some hard advice, if you show up on Pine Ridge talking about a painful family history and the horses and coyotes in your vision quest, you're going to get eaten alive.

I'm 51, I can no longer count the number of mixed-blood, dysfunctional-family sob stories I've heard in my life. It seems like these folks who feel compelled to tell me they're "part Indian too" can never produce any living relatives. Usually they throw in "raven hair," "high cheekbones" and "hiding in the hills from the government" for good measure. There are times I feel like I'm the only mixed-blood whose Native relative survived the wedding night, LOL. As Wardancer said, we've heard it a million times; too many times to take it on face value.

And it's just plain weird. I've never heard non-Indian people introduce themselves to another non-Indian person by proving they're really non-Indian. Like most other folks we'd prefer to get to know you on the basis of shared interests. It is almost like people want that "blood" connection so they can disown any "white-guilt" they might be feeling.

As for talking about visions, that is a private matter. We guard our surviving spiritual ways and teachings with a thick and heavy veil of respect and privacy. In the religious tradition to which you are trying to connect, there is a time and a place for the sharing of visions. It is a solemn thing, done carefully for there are real consequences and real powers involved. You do not treat the sacred causally.


There is a phrase you need to learn: "hecel lena oyate kin nipi kte" -- that these people might live. You will hear that phrase often in Lakota communities. Really understanding that expression grants a fundamental insight into the Lakota ethos. I was taught that from the traditional viewpoint it isn't all about you. If you're focused on what you can get out of ceremony, another person, so on you're thinking in the dominant culture mode. Ceremony is so that these people might live. The focus of your activities in the family and community is so that these people might live.
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Old 03-09-2016, 04:07 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NahimanaSung View Post
I have to say I'm very shocked by gilisi's comments. I do not have any "romantic fantasy" nor am looking for a "young hot guy", and I find it very offensive for you to assume something like that about myself.


I did not succeed in getting in touch with my relatives from there. I've sent them emails but nothing has returned, I don't even know if they still live on the rez or not. Their names are Barnett, Nicholson, and Reville.


However, I'm grateful for some of the informations some of you have given me, about how unsafe it is to go there alone. So, thank you.


I do not feel welcome at all on this forum, I don't think I'll keep posting. Thank you for those who have taught me things and tried to help. You can still contact me via private messages if you want to talk about something. Thank you.
i would like to apologize to you on behalf of the forum

we also find him foul, rude and uncouth!

shame on you gilisi, i am shocked about your lack of manners....that is NOt indian way. we are supposed to help and indulge strangers especially our european brethren who just want to learn.
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Old 03-09-2016, 04:17 PM   #15
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OLChemist, I think you interpreted my intentions in a wrong way. But thank you for the advice.


milehighsalute, thank you a lot for your words.
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Old 03-09-2016, 05:22 PM   #16
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i would like to apologize to you on behalf of the forum

we also find him foul, rude and uncouth!

shame on you gilisi, i am shocked about your lack of manners....that is NOt indian way. we are supposed to help and indulge strangers especially our european brethren who just want to learn.

@milehighsalute You need to break out the sarcasm font.
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Old 03-09-2016, 08:49 PM   #17
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Originally Posted by milehighsalute View Post
i would like to apologize to you on behalf of the forum

we also find him foul, rude and uncouth!

shame on you gilisi, i am shocked about your lack of manners....that is NOt indian way. we are supposed to help and indulge strangers especially our european brethren who just want to learn.
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I believe blood quantums are the governments way to breed us out of existance !


They say blood is thicker than water ! Now maple syrup is thicker than blood , so are pancakes more important than family ?

There are "Elders" and there are "Olders". Being the second one doesn't make the first one true !

Somebody is out there somewhere, thinking of you and the impact you made in their life.
It's not me....I think you're an idiot !





There's a chance you might not like me ,

but there's a bigger

chance I won't care
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Old 03-09-2016, 08:50 PM   #18
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Originally Posted by NahimanaSung View Post
OLChemist, I think you interpreted my intentions in a wrong way. But thank you for the advice.


milehighsalute, thank you a lot for your words.
You really need to get to know us before saying things like this !
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I believe blood quantums are the governments way to breed us out of existance !


They say blood is thicker than water ! Now maple syrup is thicker than blood , so are pancakes more important than family ?

There are "Elders" and there are "Olders". Being the second one doesn't make the first one true !

Somebody is out there somewhere, thinking of you and the impact you made in their life.
It's not me....I think you're an idiot !





There's a chance you might not like me ,

but there's a bigger

chance I won't care
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Old 03-10-2016, 04:43 AM   #19
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Old 03-10-2016, 05:23 AM   #20
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Shame on me for thinking those nice words were genuine, right?


Anyway, if a moderator comes accross this, feel free to delete this thread. Thanks to those who tried to help me. But I'm going to keep searching by myself.
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