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Forum Home - Go Back > General > Native Life Ideas on keeping son's long hair up off his shoulders... Ideas on keeping son's long hair up off his shoulders...

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Old 11-10-2014, 11:43 AM   #21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LieutenantKat View Post
I was trying to give some ideas to this woman, after all, she said she was "washed up" meaning there is not enough blood to prove she can be a registered member of a reservation.
I don't know anyone who can be a "registered member of a reservation"

I do know lots on folks that are members of a tribe !

I "washed up" for supper last night and again for coffee this morning !
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Last edited by wardancer; 11-10-2014 at 11:46 AM..
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Old 11-10-2014, 09:39 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TeenaBear View Post
How dare you say I "have no clue" when you don't even know me... Yes, I think it's just fine for little girls to dress up as the Disney Princess they admire. If you don't, then that's your prerogative. Your opinion doesn't make you a "better Indian" or "more Native" than anyone else. Get off your high horse and quit making Natives look like pompous a-holes.
You have no clue missy. Why don't you get off your low-horse and put your clothes on.
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Old 11-10-2014, 11:42 PM   #23
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Does everyone on these boards constantly fight over who is ndn and who isn't? Seems like the bickering would get old and no one learns anything. Where we live in sumner co tn they have very strict guidelines for the schools. They have several just for hair...no extreme styles, not past shoulders on boys, no unnatural colors, no scarves, no hats, no sweatbands, no bandanas. The boys must have belts, shirts tucked in, no beards etc. My son is 4 and in kindergarten. His hair is right at shoulder length. I don't have the option of moving or changing schools. I'm willing to stand up and not cut his hair but I'm also willing to compromise with the school so his days aren't hell. I was trying to get ideas from other parents that had faced similar issues.
Now for the family history. I'm what a few of you are referring to as a thin blood. I'm not dark other than my hair. My dad's side is Roma, german, scotch irish and turkish. My mom's side is scotch irish, ndn and German. I have no living relatives other than my mom. My dad died several years ago, both grandmothers died before I was born, 1 grandad died 55 plus yrs ago and my other grandad died when I was young. Other than a few oddities, recipes and tidbits my family doesn't have any traditions that were passed on bc there wasn't anyone to teach them. My kids have way more ndn blood than I do bc of my husband. I'm on the fence though if blood alone is enough to make you ndn. I'm sure there are thin bloods that know more about their heritage and live it than some full bloods so I don't think blood quantums should be the end all. I'm not looking for arts and crafts camp kum by ya stuff. I want to learn the real histories of my people, songs, food stories...everything. I want my kids to know they come from people who once lived here and didn't screw everything up, that they have some culture and traditions, that not all ndns live in tipis. I'm not running around proclaiming my indianess, I'm just trying to sencerily learn about my past. I'm too white looking anyway to run around screaming "hey I'm a cherokee princess" , lol. My kids and husband on the other hand....
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Last edited by RunnerDucks; 11-10-2014 at 11:51 PM..
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Old 11-11-2014, 12:22 AM   #24
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It may seem like we fight over who is Native. What we are actually fighting over is the right of our tribes to control their membership. But, that is beside the point.

You want to learn, good. I'm not expert but I can tell you a few things:

Quote:
Originally Posted by RunnerDucks View Post
I want my kids to know they come from people who once lived here....

Not, once but still. We are here. Now. Today. Around you. We survived.

To know your heritage you must first know your tribe. There is no generic Indian identity, just as there is no generic non-Indian identity.

Once you know your tribe, go to them. There is no book, movie, or seminar that can take the place of seeing the land and talking to the People. There are intangibles that can only be conveyed face to face.

Go humbly. You are an outsider. Don't lead with your family tree or your ideas on "Indian spirituality." Listen more than talk.

Finally, do no harm.

Last edited by OLChemist; 11-11-2014 at 12:24 AM..
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Old 11-11-2014, 02:38 AM   #25
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Originally Posted by wanjica_the_one View Post
You have no clue missy. Why don't you get off your low-horse and put your clothes on.


Quote:
Originally Posted by RunnerDucks View Post
Does everyone on these boards constantly fight over who is ndn and who isn't? Seems like the bickering would get old and no one learns anything. ...
I know, right? It's no wonder this board doesn't have much traffic. The few I have conversed with on this site have been pompous a-holes who seem to be those who live off their percap wasting their life on the internet. I'm pretty much just willing to stay on this site to offset the negativity within this forum. I want newcomers to know that not all of us are d-wads like wardancer and unintelligent like wanjica... I'm not going to start a fight on the boards, but I will stand up for myself when necessary. ;)


I talked to an Elder today about Wardancer and she just shook her head. Quit making Natives look bad, dude.
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Old 11-11-2014, 02:41 AM   #26
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I know, right? It's no wonder this board doesn't have much traffic. The few I have conversed with on this site have been pompous a-holes who seem to be those who live off their percap wasting their life on the internet. I'm pretty much just willing to stay on this site to offset the negativity within this forum. I want newcomers to know that not all of us are d-wads like wardancer and unintelligent like wanjica... I'm not going to start a fight on the boards, but I will stand up for myself when necessary. ;)


I talked to an Elder today about Wardancer and she just shook her head. Quit making Natives look bad, dude.
and this is supposed to offset the negativity?
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Old 11-11-2014, 02:44 AM   #27
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and this is supposed to offset the negativity?
touche
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Old 11-11-2014, 04:03 AM   #28
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I know, right? It's no wonder this board doesn't have much traffic. The few I have conversed with on this site have been pompous a-holes who seem to be those who live off their percap wasting their life on the internet. I'm pretty much just willing to stay on this site to offset the negativity within this forum. I want newcomers to know that not all of us are d-wads like wardancer and unintelligent like wanjica... I'm not going to start a fight on the boards, but I will stand up for myself when necessary. ;)


I talked to an Elder today about Wardancer and she just shook her head. Quit making Natives look bad, dude.
That will take the hostility down a notch or two. Geez. If you think this board is full of "pompous a-holes who are wasting their per cap", why are you still here, posting? Oh, to welcome the newcomers. Skimmed over that part. Not every newcomer is treated with disdain-and not every forum "elder" is treated with the disrespect you have shown here.
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Old 11-11-2014, 08:40 AM   #29
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RunnerDucks View Post
Does everyone on these boards constantly fight over who is ndn and who isn't? Seems like the bickering would get old and no one learns anything. Where we live in sumner co tn they have very strict guidelines for the schools. They have several just for hair...no extreme styles, not past shoulders on boys, no unnatural colors, no scarves, no hats, no sweatbands, no bandanas. The boys must have belts, shirts tucked in, no beards etc. My son is 4 and in kindergarten. His hair is right at shoulder length. I don't have the option of moving or changing schools. I'm willing to stand up and not cut his hair but I'm also willing to compromise with the school so his days aren't hell. I was trying to get ideas from other parents that had faced similar issues.
Now for the family history. I'm what a few of you are referring to as a thin blood. I'm not dark other than my hair. My dad's side is Roma, german, scotch irish and turkish. My mom's side is scotch irish, ndn and German. I have no living relatives other than my mom. My dad died several years ago, both grandmothers died before I was born, 1 grandad died 55 plus yrs ago and my other grandad died when I was young. Other than a few oddities, recipes and tidbits my family doesn't have any traditions that were passed on bc there wasn't anyone to teach them. My kids have way more ndn blood than I do bc of my husband. I'm on the fence though if blood alone is enough to make you ndn. I'm sure there are thin bloods that know more about their heritage and live it than some full bloods so I don't think blood quantums should be the end all. I'm not looking for arts and crafts camp kum by ya stuff. I want to learn the real histories of my people, songs, food stories...everything. I want my kids to know they come from people who once lived here and didn't screw everything up, that they have some culture and traditions, that not all ndns live in tipis. I'm not running around proclaiming my indianess, I'm just trying to sencerily learn about my past. I'm too white looking anyway to run around screaming "hey I'm a cherokee princess" , lol. My kids and husband on the other hand....
Roma? Never trust the Roma, I've seen them in operation.
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Old 11-11-2014, 08:41 AM   #30
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TeenaBear View Post




I know, right? It's no wonder this board doesn't have much traffic. The few I have conversed with on this site have been pompous a-holes who seem to be those who live off their percap wasting their life on the internet. I'm pretty much just willing to stay on this site to offset the negativity within this forum. I want newcomers to know that not all of us are d-wads like wardancer and unintelligent like wanjica... I'm not going to start a fight on the boards, but I will stand up for myself when necessary. ;)


I talked to an Elder today about Wardancer and she just shook her head. Quit making Natives look bad, dude.
Not today Satan.
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Old 11-11-2014, 11:54 AM   #31
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TeenaBear View Post
I talked to an Elder today about Wardancer and she just shook her head. Quit making Natives look bad, dude.

I've gone back and re-read every post. I still don't see where I said I was more ndn or better ndn than anyone else. Maybe you should also go back and read it again....read it slow...and if you want I can make the print bigger !
Not sure why you decided I was the bad guy , but I think the replies to you tell another story about who the (insert word of choice) is !

Oh yeah , before I forget , I am a mod here and politeness counts ! This is a public forum and we do have younger readers. Any more obscenities will get you banned ! Have a wonderful day !
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__________________
I believe blood quantums are the governments way to breed us out of existance !


They say blood is thicker than water ! Now maple syrup is thicker than blood , so are pancakes more important than family ?

There are "Elders" and there are "Olders". Being the second one doesn't make the first one true !

Somebody is out there somewhere, thinking of you and the impact you made in their life.
It's not me....I think you're an idiot !





There's a chance you might not like me ,

but there's a bigger

chance I won't care

Last edited by wardancer; 11-11-2014 at 12:00 PM..
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Old 11-11-2014, 07:39 PM   #32
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[QUOTE=TeenaBear;1611603]


The few I have conversed with on this site have been pompous a-holes who seem to be those who live off their percap wasting their life on the internet.


[QUOTE]

WEhave never conversed.

I get 2 really small percaps a year

How I "waste my life" is some more of your business !
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I believe blood quantums are the governments way to breed us out of existance !


They say blood is thicker than water ! Now maple syrup is thicker than blood , so are pancakes more important than family ?

There are "Elders" and there are "Olders". Being the second one doesn't make the first one true !

Somebody is out there somewhere, thinking of you and the impact you made in their life.
It's not me....I think you're an idiot !





There's a chance you might not like me ,

but there's a bigger

chance I won't care
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Old 11-12-2014, 01:43 AM   #33
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So, OP, did you know about the dress and hair code when you enrolled your son in the school? It seems to me, that if you did, enrolling him was along the lines of "accepting the schools terms of use", so to speak. If it really bothers you, is homeschooling an option?
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Old 11-12-2014, 02:35 AM   #34
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I know, right? It's no wonder this board doesn't have much traffic. The few I have conversed with on this site have been pompous a-holes who seem to be those who live off their percap wasting their life on the internet. I'm pretty much just willing to stay on this site to offset the negativity within this forum. I want newcomers to know that not all of us are d-wads like wardancer and unintelligent like wanjica... I'm not going to start a fight on the boards, but I will stand up for myself when necessary. ;)


I talked to an Elder today about Wardancer and she just shook her head. Quit making Natives look bad, dude.
hey im an azzhat too but i lead a productive life......and where is MY percap? someone is holding out on me
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Old 11-12-2014, 03:43 PM   #35
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I don't know anyone who can be a "registered member of a reservation"

I do know lots on folks that are members of a tribe !

I "washed up" for supper last night and again for coffee this morning !
I can understand that. Registered members of a reservation are recognized by the government (this something I read on a forum though). Being a tribe member is determined by the tribe itself. I guess if the woman who started this forumn really wants to know what her family life was like, she'll have to drive to that reservation I guess
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Old 11-12-2014, 03:52 PM   #36
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Runner, I think what the board is trying to tell you is that you shouldn't look at your Native heritage from a bloodline standpoint. To them, being Native American is not about who you are related to, but the traditions you have been raised with. If you really are serious about learning about your heritage, I would suggest going beyond learning about general education about native history and try to obtain any information from relatives about your family's traditions and the way they lived. As much as there are tribes with individual practices, there are also families with stories of their own.

Hopefully that makes sense
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Old 11-12-2014, 04:37 PM   #37
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Registered members of a reservation are recognized by the government (this something I read on a forum though). Being a tribe member is determined by the tribe itself.
I hope you did not read that here.

You're still not there with your understanding and use of terms. This is not just a matter of semantics. It seems to represent a significant misunderstanding of our relationships to our various tribes and the feds, and of tribes to their land base.

The reservation is a location. It is an area of land governed/managed by a tribe. You can't registered to or a member of a reservation. You can reside on a reservation.

When I'm talking about my mother's or grandfather's reservation, I'm talking about the land base of their tribe. The place they were raised sand the place they consider themselves as coming from. It is not the place where any of us currently reside.

You can be a member of a tribe. Each tribe sets its own citizenship criterion. Tribes may or may not be recognized by the federal government. Federal recognition of the tribe is what is referred in the phrase "member of a federally recognized tribe." Not all federally recognized tribes have reservations.

When I'm talking about the our tribe, I am talking about the political, cultural and kinship entity to which we have varying levels of belonging.

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...being Native American is not about who you are related to, but the traditions you have been raised with.
Kinship is part of it, since you get your traditions from your family. Or as a colleague once said during a faculty meeting: "Culture is a sexually transmitted disease."

As a descendant coming to long estranged culture and kin, you need to have reasonable expectations. You may not be welcomed with open arms. Much of what you have learned may be wrong. You will not understand everything at once -- or ever. You will never be an expert. You may well be completely out of step with everyone else; you are an outsider after all. Submission to the standards and social controls of the community is hard but necessary.

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... I would suggest going beyond learning about general education about native history and try to obtain any information from relatives about your family's traditions and the way they lived....
That is good advice.
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Old 11-12-2014, 05:33 PM   #38
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I can understand that. Registered members of a reservation are recognized by the government (this something I read on a forum though). Being a tribe member is determined by the tribe itself. I guess if the woman who started this forumn really wants to know what her family life was like, she'll have to drive to that reservation I guess
You are mis-informed.
A reservation is an area of land where the government decided to allow a Native "Tribe" to live. Most have been converted to allotments to Tribal members , but there are still a few "reservations" around. One does not get a "reservation membership".
One can however , depending on the membership criteria set forth by the "Tribe" , become a "Tribal Member".

Now , I'm not trying to out NDN anybody or say I'm a better NDN than anyone else . My earlier post was intended to show that you have to stand up for who you are. If you don't , then the dominant society will roll right on over you. Native peoples are still here ! We still exist. We're not just in the history books.
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They say blood is thicker than water ! Now maple syrup is thicker than blood , so are pancakes more important than family ?

There are "Elders" and there are "Olders". Being the second one doesn't make the first one true !

Somebody is out there somewhere, thinking of you and the impact you made in their life.
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Old 11-12-2014, 09:00 PM   #39
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Okay, thank you for explaining. Sometimes the things I'm told don't make sense or aren't very accurate.
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Old 11-12-2014, 10:11 PM   #40
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Okay, thank you for explaining. Sometimes the things I'm told don't make sense or aren't very accurate.
I apologize if I sounded rude about your post. We have many times felt the sting of racism because of the color of our skin or the length of our hair. We have overcome adversity by standing our ground, sometimes to the point of being defiant.

Sometimes we need to choose our words carefully.
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Why must I feel like that..why must I chase the cat?


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