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I hope that I am putting this in the correct section... This piece of prose was originally written after much frustration, and the pain of betrayal...But now that I read it again, I realise that it could be read as a natural, and spiritual world versus the guns,germs, and steel (As Jared Diamond would put it). This is my memorial to how the natural world used to be. Warning: It is very intense and bloody at the end.
<i>I had a wild dream.. The mists of autumn covered the still tops of the maple trees. It was noon, and freezing. Small, porcelain white flakes drifted from the heavens. One softly landed on my wet, black nose. My shaggy gold and black fur glistened with wetness, and I shuddered from the cold. As I opened my mouth, the sun shone directly on my white fangs. The haze was clearing. With alert, warm brown eyes I looked to the forest from my clearing. My ears twitch as I hear the paws padding nearer. I begin to yelp, and whine, flattening my ears. My mate is coming. Through the mist, and near the great oak steps my mate. His proud figure is hard to make out from here, but I know it’s him... For a moment I stir...What is wrong... Ah yes.... This body....It’s so unnatural to me and... Why can I not speak?....Is this....A dream?... Shaking my great head of fur, my tongue lolls out as I lope up to greet him. He growls friendly, and barks twice, wagging his tail. I crawl towards him, subordinate, on my stomach. When at last I reach him, I lay down on my back, and we kiss. It is a wet, sort of nuzzly kiss. He paws at my muzzle, and we play. He is a brilliant shade of white, all but his saddle, which is a light, beautiful natural gold. There are also two gold spots of the same color above his beautiful, light blue eyes. We continue to play, and he leads me somewhere. Trotting off into the forest, we scatter leaves at our feet. We begin to run, and the leaves spray their golden dust before us. I am bounding over streams, and climbing up hills, just to be with him. Just following his lead. As we get deeper into the forest strange things occur. It begins to get dark and hazy again. The wind rustles through the trees, and I hear the nestling of birds, but still I go on. I follow him, past a strange, unnatural structure. It’s some sort of wired fence. We leap it, and land in a muddy river. His pure, white, perfect coat is now splattered with the imperfection of dark mud. The tint of the autumn leaves makes it appear as if his fur is matted and soaked with fresh blood. We carry on, cold and muddy. Still he is happy and light, but I can feel a heavy sort of weariness in his steps. We come to a large pond eventually, deep within the heart of the forest. In the center of the pond is a small island with a rather large oak tree at the center. The oak’s limbs shadow seems to envelop the entire island. A strange, eerie light illuminates the murky water of the pond. I enter the murky waters after my mate. He gingerly, and quickly lopes through the water, up to the giant oak and sits, obediently waiting. I feel something hard beneath my foot. As I look down, through the gloom and mud, I see a skull of one of our kind. He beckons me forward, and I come forward. Upon stepping on the ground, an eerie, and akward feeling passes through my very soul. An unearthly breeze sends shivers through my fur. The hair on my hackles stands on end, and I smell...A rancid, rotting smell of death....I smell coated, dried blood. I cautiously step forward and.... An excruciating, searing pain!!! Unlike any I have EVER felt... It runs up my leg, from my ankle, tearing it’s way through my flesh, and burning my blood. He looks down upon me, and seems to grin maliciously. I look down at the source of the pain to find a steel demon’s jaws wrapped around my ankle. I cannot move, though I struggle. When I look back at the oak tree, my mate is gone. Now stands a tall human man... His black boots covered in mud, as are his ripped blue jean pants, and torn blue flannel shirt. Not only are they covered in mud, but they are coated with dry, and drying layers of blood. His snowy skin deeply contrasted with the dark colors of his clothes, and the blood that coated them. His hair was the same gold as my mate’s fur, and his eyes.... A ghostly, haunting blue. He began to laugh, standing arms akimbo, staring me down. His laugh was harsh and cold, yet loud. I looked up at him, my sad brown eyes brimming with crystalline tears. He had led me straight into the jaws of death. He had led me up the platform to be hanged. I howled, mournfully, my left paw drenched in my own blood. I cried to the sky. I opened my mouth, and a solo from the chorus of my people sung the song of death. Suddenly, four bullets. One striking me on the thigh, and sinking in deep. It burned with a thousand fires... So much pain... One on the right side of my chest. Coughing, I drew in a breath, and when I exhaled, blood rolled down my tongue and seeped out of the corners of my mouth. My eyes widened with each blow... Then... A bullet to the heart. It pierced straight through... And finally, A bullet to the forehead...Then blackness. I was blind... I was tricked... I was alone, in a black, dark cage. I blindly dragged myself, wounded, and dying back to my den. I pulled my wretched, bleeding, twisted, mangled corpse back to my lair... I lay in the back of my cold den, waiting for death to come. He was gone... All that I believed was gone... He had disappeared from sight, but not from mind..He had taken my home, and my people.In my dying moments, I realized that I too was human, and that this was a dream... I waited to awaken before I died, and then I had a revelation... I realized this was not a dream, but reality.</i>
<i>I had a wild dream.. The mists of autumn covered the still tops of the maple trees. It was noon, and freezing. Small, porcelain white flakes drifted from the heavens. One softly landed on my wet, black nose. My shaggy gold and black fur glistened with wetness, and I shuddered from the cold. As I opened my mouth, the sun shone directly on my white fangs. The haze was clearing. With alert, warm brown eyes I looked to the forest from my clearing. My ears twitch as I hear the paws padding nearer. I begin to yelp, and whine, flattening my ears. My mate is coming. Through the mist, and near the great oak steps my mate. His proud figure is hard to make out from here, but I know it’s him... For a moment I stir...What is wrong... Ah yes.... This body....It’s so unnatural to me and... Why can I not speak?....Is this....A dream?... Shaking my great head of fur, my tongue lolls out as I lope up to greet him. He growls friendly, and barks twice, wagging his tail. I crawl towards him, subordinate, on my stomach. When at last I reach him, I lay down on my back, and we kiss. It is a wet, sort of nuzzly kiss. He paws at my muzzle, and we play. He is a brilliant shade of white, all but his saddle, which is a light, beautiful natural gold. There are also two gold spots of the same color above his beautiful, light blue eyes. We continue to play, and he leads me somewhere. Trotting off into the forest, we scatter leaves at our feet. We begin to run, and the leaves spray their golden dust before us. I am bounding over streams, and climbing up hills, just to be with him. Just following his lead. As we get deeper into the forest strange things occur. It begins to get dark and hazy again. The wind rustles through the trees, and I hear the nestling of birds, but still I go on. I follow him, past a strange, unnatural structure. It’s some sort of wired fence. We leap it, and land in a muddy river. His pure, white, perfect coat is now splattered with the imperfection of dark mud. The tint of the autumn leaves makes it appear as if his fur is matted and soaked with fresh blood. We carry on, cold and muddy. Still he is happy and light, but I can feel a heavy sort of weariness in his steps. We come to a large pond eventually, deep within the heart of the forest. In the center of the pond is a small island with a rather large oak tree at the center. The oak’s limbs shadow seems to envelop the entire island. A strange, eerie light illuminates the murky water of the pond. I enter the murky waters after my mate. He gingerly, and quickly lopes through the water, up to the giant oak and sits, obediently waiting. I feel something hard beneath my foot. As I look down, through the gloom and mud, I see a skull of one of our kind. He beckons me forward, and I come forward. Upon stepping on the ground, an eerie, and akward feeling passes through my very soul. An unearthly breeze sends shivers through my fur. The hair on my hackles stands on end, and I smell...A rancid, rotting smell of death....I smell coated, dried blood. I cautiously step forward and.... An excruciating, searing pain!!! Unlike any I have EVER felt... It runs up my leg, from my ankle, tearing it’s way through my flesh, and burning my blood. He looks down upon me, and seems to grin maliciously. I look down at the source of the pain to find a steel demon’s jaws wrapped around my ankle. I cannot move, though I struggle. When I look back at the oak tree, my mate is gone. Now stands a tall human man... His black boots covered in mud, as are his ripped blue jean pants, and torn blue flannel shirt. Not only are they covered in mud, but they are coated with dry, and drying layers of blood. His snowy skin deeply contrasted with the dark colors of his clothes, and the blood that coated them. His hair was the same gold as my mate’s fur, and his eyes.... A ghostly, haunting blue. He began to laugh, standing arms akimbo, staring me down. His laugh was harsh and cold, yet loud. I looked up at him, my sad brown eyes brimming with crystalline tears. He had led me straight into the jaws of death. He had led me up the platform to be hanged. I howled, mournfully, my left paw drenched in my own blood. I cried to the sky. I opened my mouth, and a solo from the chorus of my people sung the song of death. Suddenly, four bullets. One striking me on the thigh, and sinking in deep. It burned with a thousand fires... So much pain... One on the right side of my chest. Coughing, I drew in a breath, and when I exhaled, blood rolled down my tongue and seeped out of the corners of my mouth. My eyes widened with each blow... Then... A bullet to the heart. It pierced straight through... And finally, A bullet to the forehead...Then blackness. I was blind... I was tricked... I was alone, in a black, dark cage. I blindly dragged myself, wounded, and dying back to my den. I pulled my wretched, bleeding, twisted, mangled corpse back to my lair... I lay in the back of my cold den, waiting for death to come. He was gone... All that I believed was gone... He had disappeared from sight, but not from mind..He had taken my home, and my people.In my dying moments, I realized that I too was human, and that this was a dream... I waited to awaken before I died, and then I had a revelation... I realized this was not a dream, but reality.</i>
