Living Will

[wyo_rose]

Hardest decision ever.

While you're healthy it's easy to say that you don't want to be resusitated or hooked to any machines to help sustain life, but when it comes down to life or death...who wouldn't want to be saved??

My mom wouldn't still be here today if she didn't change her mind. She's a former nurse and has rheumatoid arthritis and other health problems, not to mention she's 81 now. Sunday she had a heart attack and told the doctor she didn't want to have CPR or a breathing machine.

Of course, I broke down crying but didn't say anything cuz it was her decision. Then she started fighting for breath. It was a very rough few minutes. The doctor came in and said he usually doesn't ask patients twice but since I (me) was so broken up about her decision, he asked her again if she wanted the breathing machine. She did and they hooked it up and it saved her life.

I later told the doctor that if it was up to me, I'd want them to do everything possible and I'd even perform the CPR if I had to. I mean, that's my mom! But now she has standing orders for no CPR, only meds, and they can't put the breathing machine back in after taking it out yesterday.

Still wondering what's the right thing to do. She's very weak and suffering on and off physically and mentally. I hate to see her suffer, but I hate to think of her dying while fighting for breath.

I'll never forget her struggle to breathe...and live.

[SheTurtle]

I later told the doctor that if it was up to me, I'd want them to do everything possible and I'd even perform the CPR if I had to. I mean, that's my mom! But now she has standing orders for no CPR, only meds, and they can't put the breathing machine back in after taking it out yesterday.

Still wondering what's the right thing to do. She's very weak and suffering on and off physically and mentally. I hate to see her suffer, but I hate to think of her dying while fighting for breath.

I pray that the Creator will ease her pain and yours. I cannot imagine watching my parents go through a lingering death. Both my parents and my oldest sister died before anyone could call the paramedics. Their passage was quick and merciful. That was many years ago. I miss them all deeply, but the pain I felt when they passed through is not as great as it initially was.

You provided your own answer in your comments. She is suffering physically and mentally. You are suffering as you watch her struggle. Ask her doctors to do what they can to help make her passage peaceful. You must respect her wishes. Ask for the strength to let her go in dignity.

[Creewoman05]

I am really sorry to hear that rose. I hope that you have the strength to do the right thing.

[wyo_rose]

Thanks for your prayers!! That's all I can do is pray and be there for her.

I did pray for strength too, and to be able to make a good decision.

And for some reason I watched Anne of the Thousand Days when I couldn't sleep...an old movie about Henry the VIII's second wife who had to be a strong woman...and it made me feel like I could be stronger too.

And the doctor said my mom is stabilizing physically...her mental condition has a ways to go.