I'm confused...wannabe's, posers? Not dark enough? Help:)

[jwhitley]

Ok, I'm going to need some help with this one please:)
I've been reading around on here, and I see everyone talking about wannabe's, and white people at pow-wows and such, well, I guess I need some clarification. Ok, I'm not 100% ndn, but the lady in the pic (one of my g grandmas, is in the Dawes book with roll number) and always felt connected to ndns. I know I'm part ndn through blood.... So, with that being said, do you all hate me, or think less of me because I 'don't "look" enough to be ndn'. I do have the dark hair, dark eyes, and somewhat darker skin and facial structure. People have commented to me 'are you ndn?' "yes" 'HOW!' I find that kinda disrespectful, and they just go on saying crap, but that's a different story:)
So one if my question's is; if you don't 'look' ndn, but you are, then how do you portray that to others? Most people know I'm native b/c of my hair, and some jewelry I wear, and such. But I don't think when I enterduce myself to people I should say 'Halito. I'm Jennifer and I'm Choctaw'. I mean, why should I push it down peoples throat?
If I could get some help in this issue, I would greatly appreciate it:)
Thanks so much.

[Blackbear]

You just answered it yourself.. Why push it down someone's throat? You tell people... either they believe you or they don't. Nothing is more annoying than someone who is or thinks they are indian pushing it down someone's throat and people will be less likely to believe you are if you are if you push it.

[ac_miss]

You're either native or not, it's simple as that. As Blackbear said, don't push it down people's throats.

Check.

Next.

[jwhitley]

Right, right. And I don't push it down peoples throats, so what about other ndns? Do they think I'm a wannabe because I don't know much about my heritage and culture as they do? I don't know much about the customs, and I don't know any of the dances, although, I am trying really hard to learn about all of it! It's not my fault that nobody in my family started talking about this until now....
Am I concidered a wannabe by ndns?

[Fast Buck]

respect

You should not feel bad about your ancestry, after all it's what your parents gave you. If you were able to, what part of your body would cut out if you want to be all Indian? Would you keep only your eyes, hair, and pieces of your skin? You're not by yourself, you know. You have thousands with you. To me, you're Indian. What Native American Blood you carry reperesents your ancestors, a group of Indian people, a tribe, a nation, who now may be extint or may have only a few left. You should respect those people respresented in your blood, and if you want to dance at powwows, you should dance for them. After all a true dancer dances for his ancestors, his creator, and himself. I personally have danced in powwows with dancers that look like Viking warriors, or Zulu warriors, but if there is Native American blood flowing through them, that's what I respect and welcome them to the circle. (I am a "full-blood," and carry a card with a federal number saying I belong to a tribe). Walk easy and take care.

[subeeds]

I have had rude people just ask out of the blue if I was NDN. I was raised to be polite, so I just answer "yes, my Grandfather was Cheyenne" and try to get away from them ASAP. As for being a "wannabee", I think of those people as the "new agers". They want the ceremonies and the rituals because they think it will make them "cool". I'm still trying to figure that one out. Or some of them want all the money they think NDN's get from the government.

[creekfairy]

I considor myself of "mixed heritage"... because... well lemme get out the list... ahem... Creek, Cherokee, Mexican, Irish, German, French, African American, ummm I'm sure I've missed a few in there somewhere.
Anyways... I don't considor myself just indian... I considor myself mixed... obviously because I am. So when I check the little lame boxes on what race I am... I always pick mixed... eventho people just automatically asume that I'm only mexican or that I'm only indian... they have no clue about the other stuff... I've got dark hair, dark eyes, tan skin... so anyways

[timmy tiger]

Right, right. And I don't push it down peoples throats, so what about other ndns? Do they think I'm a wannabe because I don't know much about my heritage and culture as they do? I don't know much about the customs, and I don't know any of the dances, although, I am trying really hard to learn about all of it! It's not my fault that nobody in my family started talking about this until now....
Am I concidered a wannabe by ndns?

Honestly, why does it matter what others think about you? Do they know what you think about them?

Live your life and who you are for you not for other's, that's one of the biggest mistakes that I have seen many people make.

I know who I am, my family knows who I am---so if someone who doesn't know me or want to get to know me doesn't know who I am--that's their loss, not mine.

There are people who are going to like you and accept you no matter what and then there are those who don't like themselves and can't accept themselves---so how can they accept you or anyone else? Just my opinion here.

Oh and just an FYI--my step-grandfather was OK Choctaw and so are my two Aunts, so I know the people that you come through and they are great people

[jwhitley]

Thank you all soooo much! You all rock!
I'm not ashamed of myself, or my family, I'm extreamly proud of my hertiage and all that! ( I do wish I was more though, but who cares!? )
Anyways! I keep on truckin! I guess it just makes me mad when me and others do get in 'race' topics, I of course tell them I'm ndn, and I always get 'Oh me too! I have ndn blood. We're Cherokee.' My reply?:
"Oh! Of course you are! Everybody is right!? I mean, if the white man came and raped my peoples women, then yeah, you might have some ndn blood in you." (I'm such a smart alick!)
But I just get sick of everyone saying their ndn b/c that's what they heard, and they don't do any research or anything!
Anyways! BUT, about the money....you can get all or some of your college paid for right? I mean, I'll go even if my tribe don't pay for it, but I thought it wouldn't hurt to ask:)

Thank you all so much for your help, and I'm looking forward to more learning, and getting to know some people:)
Timmy, glad to hear we're related:) My aunts (of course) are Choctaw too. Couldn't love them more.
Here's a stupid question: Do ndn's usely have a strong love for their family and respect? I mean, my family is over the top, and I didn't know if it's just us, or if that's the way Choctaws are:) Thanks:)

[they_drag_him]

BUT, about the money....you can get all or some of your college paid for right? I mean, I'll go even if my tribe don't pay for it, but I thought it wouldn't hurt to ask:)

They don't give us money, they give us cheese!

[jwhitley]

They don't give us money, they give us cheese!

Well thanks I like cheese :)

[Blackbear]

Thank you all soooo much! You all rock!
I'm not ashamed of myself, or my family, I'm extreamly proud of my hertiage and all that! ( I do wish I was more though, but who cares!? )

You just learned of this so why should you be ashamed? On the other hand why should you be extremely proud either? I mean, it's just a fact about yourself right? Does knowing you have this bit of indian blood somehow make you more special than if you did'nt have it? How about just being proud about being who you are and how you were raised and "extremely proud" of finding out things you did'nt know before?

Anyways! I keep on truckin! I guess it just makes me mad when me and others do get in 'race' topics, I of course tell them I'm ndn, and I always get 'Oh me too! I have ndn blood. We're Cherokee.' My reply?:
"Oh! Of course you are! Everybody is right!? I mean, if the white man came and raped my peoples women, then yeah, you might have some ndn blood in you." (I'm such a smart alick!)

Uh yeah, see and that's not exactly the attitude to take either especially when you just recently found out. I mean here you come in here asking about acceptance but you are pulling a double standard for others? And why would they have to have been a product of rape???? I mean that's pretty crass there. What if that's what your ancestor was accused of, being a raped female??? I'd hate for people to think that of my dad someday if my daughter and her children decided to marry non native. My mom and dad are very loving to each other so how do you know their ancestors were'nt?

But I just get sick of everyone saying their ndn b/c that's what they heard, and they don't do any research or anything!

And yet you are here saying the same thing and we've not seen proof that you have done any research or anything. Don't be getting a big head because you think everyone here has just already accepted your claims. You asked a question and we answered in a very on point way... to assume you are telling us the truth.

Anyways! BUT, about the money....you can get all or some of your college paid for right? I mean, I'll go even if my tribe don't pay for it, but I thought it wouldn't hurt to ask:)

yeah the same way everyone else gets it paid for.. by earning scholarships and applying for scholarships and grants from many organizations out there offering them. In other words, you still gotta work it by finding them and applying. There is no magical form out there for "get your college mostly, all or in part paid for cause you be indin".

Thank you all so much for your help, and I'm looking forward to more learning, and getting to know some people:)
Timmy, glad to hear we're related:) My aunts (of course) are Choctaw too. Couldn't love them more.
Here's a stupid question: Do ndn's usely have a strong love for their family and respect? I mean, my family is over the top, and I didn't know if it's just us, or if that's the way Choctaws are:) Thanks:)

Name me a culture that don't have a strong love and respect for family.....

[Blackbear]

I have had rude people just ask out of the blue if I was NDN. I was raised to be polite, so I just answer "yes, my Grandfather was Cheyenne" and try to get away from them ASAP. As for being a "wannabee", I think of those people as the "new agers". They want the ceremonies and the rituals because they think it will make them "cool". I'm still trying to figure that one out. Or some of them want all the money they think NDN's get from the government.

It's not exactly rude... people ask because people want to know. And why you saying Grandfather was a cheyenne when you answer... does that or does that not make your parent and you cheyenne as well? Why are'nt you answering, "yes I am Cheyenne?" Then if they go so far as to ask how much you tell them Grandpa was a full blood or whatever.....

[jwhitley]

Blackbear, you kinda hurt my feelings. I came here wanting answers and to learn more, and to be "accepted" and you went down my throat. Oh well, I'm not mad, water off the back.....

Quote:
Originally Posted by jwhitley
Thank you all soooo much! You all rock!
I'm not ashamed of myself, or my family, I'm extreamly proud of my hertiage and all that! ( I do wish I was more though, but who cares!? )

You just learned of this so why should you be ashamed? On the other hand why should you be extremely proud either? I mean, it's just a fact about yourself right? Does knowing you have this bit of indian blood somehow make you more special than if you did'nt have it? How about just being proud about being who you are and how you were raised and "extremely proud" of finding out things you did'nt know before?

I am proud of being just me, but I'm also excitted about my roots. My family always knew we were ndn, but nobody talked about it and we didn't know how much untill my aunt starting researching. I've always felt like a native and always had strong respect for them.

Quote:
Anyways! I keep on truckin! I guess it just makes me mad when me and others do get in 'race' topics, I of course tell them I'm ndn, and I always get 'Oh me too! I have ndn blood. We're Cherokee.' My reply?:
"Oh! Of course you are! Everybody is right!? I mean, if the white man came and raped my peoples women, then yeah, you might have some ndn blood in you." (I'm such a smart alick!)

Uh yeah, see and that's not exactly the attitude to take either especially when you just recently found out. I mean here you come in here asking about acceptance but you are pulling a double standard for others? And why would they have to have been a product of rape???? I mean that's pretty crass there. What if that's what your ancestor was accused of, being a raped female??? I'd hate for people to think that of my dad someday if my daughter and her children decided to marry non native. My mom and dad are very loving to each other so how do you know their ancestors were'nt?

Well, it's mostly my reply for this one guy in mind. All I'm saying is some people really don't know the truth about Columbus, or the way "america" started.....I'm not pulling a double standard. And I didn't JUST find out, just happened to find out how much.


Quote:
But I just get sick of everyone saying their ndn b/c that's what they heard, and they don't do any research or anything!

And yet you are here saying the same thing and we've not seen proof that you have done any research or anything. Don't be getting a big head because you think everyone here has just already accepted your claims. You asked a question and we answered in a very on point way... to assume you are telling us the truth.

Do you want me to show you the Roll Number? Birth and death certificates? I asked him, 'Really? Done research?" Do you carry card? Why shold we accept your claims?

Quote:
Anyways! BUT, about the money....you can get all or some of your college paid for right? I mean, I'll go even if my tribe don't pay for it, but I thought it wouldn't hurt to ask:)

yeah the same way everyone else gets it paid for.. by earning scholarships and applying for scholarships and grants from many organizations out there offering them. In other words, you still gotta work it by finding them and applying. There is no magical form out there for "get your college mostly, all or in part paid for cause you be indin".

Yeah, well, I do work hard, for everything I got. Would you not accept the help if it was offered?

Quote:
Thank you all so much for your help, and I'm looking forward to more learning, and getting to know some people:)
Timmy, glad to hear we're related:) My aunts (of course) are Choctaw too. Couldn't love them more.
Here's a stupid question: Do ndn's usely have a strong love for their family and respect? I mean, my family is over the top, and I didn't know if it's just us, or if that's the way Choctaws are:) Thanks:)

Name me a culture that don't have a strong love and respect for family.....

[timmy tiger]

Jwhitley--There is an old saying and it's one of my favorites "Watch what you say, 'cause you never know who you are speaking to". I'm bringing that up for a reason.

BB was not jumping down your throat, I've read enough of her posts and have talked to her enough times to know that she was just pointing out to you where you started off by asking questions and then went from there to being totally judgemental about others. That is what people who care do. BB is a good person and helps out alot of people--but she will also set some straight if they get a little carried away.

Wether you know it or not--I'm NOT Choctaw--that was my Step-grandfather. Actually I am Cherokee along with many other's on these threads. And the research that you talk about---I have done it for many. And there are other's on here who are the same way. Not everyone who says that they are Cherokee are lying---I have my connections and so do many other's. But it's comments like you made above that can throw some people off. Not that some of us haven't said the same thing ourselves a few times (just about everyone being Cherokee and not many doing the research to prove it)--so please don't think that I'm picking on you or singling you out--I'm really not. It's just that you came asking advice and then made a judgement right afterwards that really didn't come accross in a good way. Wether you meant it that way or not.