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Deeply Hurt

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  • Deeply Hurt

    Hello all
    I really need some support right now....if you have any words of comfort please send them my way.
    I guess it goes something like this. I just found out my husband is having an affair with a co-worker. I didn't believe it at first but I seen them together way to many times now and his excuse of "were just working together" don't cut it anymore. he's moved out, everytime I try to talk to him he gets mad and walks away. doesn't bother to come home to watch his kids on his days off. I need to let go and accept that he don't love me anymore but i'm still hanging on. I'm in love with a man who don't give a crap about me. As you can tell i'm hurting today..Please HELP! :(

  • #2
    Hey acoma - I'm so sorry to hear that you're having a hard time. I don't know what I can say to help ease the hurt but know that I and others are thinking of you and sending prayers your way!:Angel2


    • #3
      OOh thank you so much singing eagle. it's been very hard. I never saw this coming at all. I'm just hurting so much I sometimes don't know what to do.


      • #4
        Things I'd suggest you look into:

        A family lawyer to ensure your children receive child support

        Bank manager - to begin closing joint accounts and also to protect your assets.

        Even though you may not require shelter services, you could call a women's shelter and see if they have info on resources in your area - they're likely to have the most up to date lists and numbers. maybe they can recommend a therapist to help you to process what is happening.

        I'm here if you want to vent!

        Last edited by Singing Eagle; 01-16-2004, 11:40 AM.


        • #5
          I'm sending the best of thoughts to you and your family. Just know that this deep pain and heartache you have now will lessen with time. I know this sounds futile now but keep reminding yourself that tomorrow comes with new hope.

          I would like to add to Singing Eagle's excellent advice that you not wait hoping your husband will come back but go ahead and take action. Even if things work out between you two it will have shown him how strong you are without him.


          • #6
            Now that you know about the affair, it's time to move on. I'm sure it had been bugging you for a while. Now you know the truth even if it hurts. But you know what? Despite losing him, you'll gain something even better---finding yourself.

            Despite all this, don't blame yourself. It's not your fault that he's a liar and a cheat. Just be strong. Hang in there. We're here for support.
            Bead All You Can Bead


            • #7
              acoma...everyone here has great thoughts for you. Our prayers are with you and thier are plenty of people her to talk to if you need to vent or just a shoulder to cry on... :) hold your head up high and always remember you are a strong woman.
              "finding your best friend in life and love is glorious"


              • #8

                Hi Acoma! Hang in there...I can almost feel that pain you have, my prayers are going out to you. Take care of yourself and your children. If you are feeling sad, pray to the creator, he works in good mysterious ways. :Angel2


                • #9
                  hahhaha we need a bad men support group! hahaha ok dang send all HATE EMAILS to MATO WINYAN! hahahah jks

                  awww ...ummm... girl keep your chin up. Sometimes its better to be on your own rather than take yo man's cheating ways. CUZ if he does it to ya and u stay with him its like telling him he can do it again... and again and again.

                  u got some good advice ^^^... Good luck with everything...

                  U always got the board here when u wanna vent and need some support! the peeps on this board are very helpful in times of need.
                  The only time its too late to start dancing is when you're dead.


                  • #10
                    I'm am so sorry acoma I know what you going through I have been there. it's not easy, and I don't know you, but I believe your a strong woman and you'll get through this & everyone here on pw' is here to suppor you, please get your fiance's in order.
                    my ex- stopped putting money in our account & started a new one< I did not know this & when I wrote out the checks to pay the bills they all bounced.
                    & as far as him not talking to you, he'll get over it he has no reason to be. angry with you. You didn't do anything wrong
                    don't you be wastin' all your money
                    on syrup and honey because i'm sweet enough

                    Life is short, Break the rules, Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly, Love truly, Laugh uncontrollably, And never regret anything that made you smile.


                    • #11
                      ooooh you guys...I knew I could come here and get some much needed support.
                      I'll have to honestly say I feel down and out and it's been so hard. we have been married 15 years, and so many powwow memories, right now I don't think I could ever even go to another powwow or listen to powwow music. It's especailly harder on my kids. I see and feel their pain.
                      It's even harder when I think about them working together now, I see his affair around town and she's so HAPPY, she stood behind me at the store and didn't even care.
                      I wish I was angry but i'm not i'm hurt and sad most of the time. He's blamed me for everything he could think of, I don't believe what he says i'm just more hurt that he has the nerve to try and blame me and walk away and not even feel bad for what he'd said to me. He just don't even care and i can't get THAT!! HE DON"T LOVE ME!! then how come I can't get it through my thick head and get mad and move on I CAN"T.
                      I'm sorry you guys it's just hard.


                      • #12
                        Anger will not saulve anything, it just causes more stress
                        I have no Anger or hatred toward my Ex, I have learned he is who he is & nothing I can say or do will change that, my boys were hurt & confused at first now they are happy & love us both they live with me, & they are little by little learning about their dad. I was married to him for 19 years
                        do not say anythin bad about him to your kids it is not heathy.
                        Vent all you want here. :)
                        don't you be wastin' all your money
                        on syrup and honey because i'm sweet enough

                        Life is short, Break the rules, Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly, Love truly, Laugh uncontrollably, And never regret anything that made you smile.


                        • #13
                          thanks ginger..I haven't done nothing about anything our bills are still collecting dust i'm worried about our bills but I'm more worried about our lil family. How could he? I just want to know WHY? he won't even say why? he just gets mad at me, and runs off. he won't even come by to see his kids or watch them when he's off. HE's lost it!


                          • #14
                            I don't really know what to say.I found my best friend who was my girlfriend and was supose to be my wife this year in bed with another man about 3 months ago.I still am not over it but I have to move on.Sometimes I feel like just giveing up on everything,But I do have friends out there that do help out at times.I am always putting my heart out on my sleaves so everyone can use it or hurt it.I am to kind hurted for my own good says my Mom.I know how hard it is to catch someone like that.I been there all my life,One after another.Its not easy but I am here for anyone that wants to talk or needs a friend.......

                            John Moore:D
                            Keep It Traditional


                            • #15
                              If anyone wants to chat with me.I am always around a computer.My e mail address is.Dreamweaversoultaker oreagletail11 ordreamweaversoultaker or eagletail2000
                              I will answer anyone that wants to chat........

                              John Moore
                              Keep It Traditional


                              Join the online community forum celebrating Native American Culture, Pow Wows, tribes, music, art, and history.

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