Sumo

Collapse

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Priceless

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Priceless

    Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn't taste like alcohol at all. He didn't even remember how he got home from the party. As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong. Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table and, next to them, a single red rose!! Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.

    He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick: 'Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling! Love, Jillian'

    He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His 16 year old son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, 'Son, what happened last night?' 'Well, you came home after 3 A.M, drunk and out of your mind, you fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.' Confused, he asked his son, 'So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me??'


    His son replies, 'Oh THAT... Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, 'Leave me alone *****, I'm married!!'

    Broken coffee Table $239.99
    Hot breakfast $4.20
    Two aspirins $.38
    Saying the right thing, at the right time: PRICELESS
    sigpic This is how I dance when your standing next to me...

    "Cry 'Havoc' and let slip the Dogs of War..."

  • #2
    I like that. He is really gonna be treated like a king for a long time.LOL

    Comment


    • #3
      yep.
      Courage is just fear that has said it's prayers.

      Comment


      • #4
        Lmao!!!!!
        I'm innocent I tell ya!!!

        Comment


        • #5
          Now that one made me laugh out loud.

          Comment


          • #6

            That was awesome I didn't see that ending! I'd seriously treat him with a bit of extra care too! hahhaha
            "I tried being normal once, worse 2 mins of my life!"

            Comment


            • #7
              awwww.... so cute in a weird kinda way lol
              :party: :laughing: :wazzup_sg :chillpill :character :eeyore: :ariel: :indian: :war00000: :smillie_f :merrychri :toot0000: :lol_hitti :walkingco :bday_2: :hysterica
              bunch of random things

              Comment


              • #8
                Have you been talking to my wife?
                Something exists.

                Comment

                Join the online community forum celebrating Native American Culture, Pow Wows, tribes, music, art, and history.

                Related Topics

                Collapse

                • suthernwaterbird
                  Chuck Norris
                  by suthernwaterbird
                  * When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

                  * Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

                  * There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed
                  ...
                  01-24-2008, 09:20 AM
                • heynicci
                  An Indian Father's Plea
                  by heynicci
                  I do not want to infringe on the copyright rules and regulations, I do want to tell you that Robert Lake wrote this article. Robert Lake (Medicine Grizzlybear), a member of the Seneca and Cherokee Indian tribes, is an associate professor at Gonzaga University's School of Education in Spokane, Washington....
                  07-25-2010, 12:26 AM
                • Kituhwa
                  Mark Twain, Indian Hater
                  by Kituhwa
                  I don't know if any of you have seen this before but....

                  I'm sitting here right now, absolutely nauseated by the fame and
                  heroic persona attributed to the American author Mark Twain, the PBS
                  special about him is on right now, and I honestly just want to puke
                  and here...
                  01-05-2004, 01:34 AM
                • Southernstr8
                  A couple of weeks before the wedding....
                  by Southernstr8
                  ok....I'll keep this one as clean as possible.....


                  A young man while getting prepared for he and his bride's big day suddenly realizes that he is a virgin. With this in mind the thought of he and his beloved terrifies him. So, after some thought he goes to see a sex therapist....
                  03-31-2004, 12:13 AM
                • southernx_hunnie08
                  uncle teds morals
                  by southernx_hunnie08
                  Billy's homework assignment is to think of a true story with a moral so he goes home and thinks about it all night and finally has one. The following day, Suzy raises her hand and says, "My dad owns a farm and every Sunday we load the chicken eggs on the truck and drive into town to sell them at...
                  03-29-2007, 08:41 AM

                Trending

                Collapse

                There are no results that meet this criteria.

                Sidebar Ad

                Collapse
                Working...
                X