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  • what is the most humorous native joke you heard?

    :hey!: plz. share your most humorous native joke you heard...
    be glad of life... because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look at the stars...life is not having and getting, but a being and a becoming..

  • #2
    nothing but ndns there

    a ndn is sitting in a bus stop with two old white men the first white guy says hey herb where u going for vacation this year ? herb tells him im going to montana to fish this year the first guy looks at him and exclaims y do u want to go there for there aint nothing but a bunch of damned ndns there herb then asks where u going the guy says im going to arizona and soak up some sun herb looks @him and yells u moron there nothing but a bunch of damned ndns there then the ndn guy speaks up and comments y dont u both just go to hell there aint any ndns there lol its not the funniest ive herd but its funny


    peace love and frybread grease

    You got me lifted shifted higher than a ceiling And ooh wee it's the ultimate feeling
    You got me lifted feeling so gifted Sugar how you get so fly?¿?


    ****Mary had a little lamb but grandma butchered it****

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: nothing but ndns there

      Originally posted by EuChEe4LiFe
      a ndn is sitting in a bus stop with two old white men the first white guy says hey herb where u going for vacation this year ? herb tells him im going to montana to fish this year the first guy looks at him and exclaims y do u want to go there for there aint nothing but a bunch of damned ndns there herb then asks where u going the guy says im going to arizona and soak up some sun herb looks @him and yells u moron there nothing but a bunch of damned ndns there then the ndn guy speaks up and comments y dont u both just go to hell there aint any ndns there lol its not the funniest ive herd but its funny


      peace love and frybread grease
      lol thats funny :D ;)
      "I AM BUT A MIST OF WATER IN A RAIN STORM""FOR I HAVE MUCH TO LEARN."

      Comment


      • #4
        one of the funniest ones i've heard is this one:

        there was a casino bus full of 20 ugly indians. the bus crashes with a truck, it was a head on collision eh, so everyone of them people on that truck died. so they all go to their spirit world and they get to see the creator. since the creator felt bad about their "problem" and the way they had died, he decided to grant them one wish. so he says to the 1st indian "what do you wish?" the first indian says "i wanna be handsome." and POOF he was handsome. he goes to the 2nd indian and asks him what his wish is. it was the same as the first and POOF! he was handsome. it continued on like that for awhile. and by the time the creator got to the tenth indian, the last indian was laughing, like he was laughin real hard eh. anyways, the creator is askin all these indians what he wishes, and that last indian over there is laughing hysterically by the time it's his turn. The creator asks "and what is your wish?" the indian just laughs even harder. after a few minutes he calmed down and says "Make em all ugly again!"


        :Chatter haha.. that made me laugh.

        Comment


        • #5
          Don't Mess With Indian Women

          A Kiowa man has six beautiful children, and is very proud of his achievement. He is so proud of himself that he starts calling his wife "Mother of Six" in spite of her objections. One night they go to a party. The man decides that it's time to go home, and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well. He shouts at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home my little mother of six?" His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion, shouts back, "Anytime you're ready, father of four!"


          :Chatter :p :Chatter
          "I AM BUT A MIST OF WATER IN A RAIN STORM""FOR I HAVE MUCH TO LEARN."

          Comment


          • #6
            Old man is sitting on his front porch without his leggings on. His nephew walks by and says "Uncle, what are you doing sitting out here without your pants on?" old man says.."Last week I sat out here without no shirt, gotta stiff neck"......."ayyy
            My bark is worse than my bite

            Comment


            • #7
              Did You Hear The One About...

              A Cree man and a Ojibway woman who have never met before find themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a transcontinental train. After the initial embarrassment and uneasiness, they both go to sleep. The Cree man in the upper berth, and the Ojibway woman in the lower berth.

              In the middle of the night the Cree man leans over, wakes the Ojibway woman and says,"I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm awfully cold and I was wondering if you could possibly reach over and get me another blanket." The Ojibway woman leans out and, with a glint in her eye says, "I have better idea. Just for tonight let's pretend that we are married." The Cree man happily says, "OK! AWESOME!" Then the Ojibway woman says "GOOD..... Get your own blanket."

              :Chatter :p :Chatter :agree?:
              "I AM BUT A MIST OF WATER IN A RAIN STORM""FOR I HAVE MUCH TO LEARN."

              Comment


              • #8
                Top 10 Things To Say To A Non-Indian Upon First Meeting

                JUST FOR KICKS..

                10. How much white are you?

                9. I'm part white myself, you know.

                8. I learned all your people's ways in the Boy Scouts (Order of the Bullet).
                :Chatter

                7. My great-great-grandmother was a full-blooded European princess.

                6. Funny, you don't look white.


                5. Where's your powdered wig and knickers?

                4. Do you live in a covered wagon?

                3. What's the meaning behind the square dance?:sw200:

                2. Oh wow, I really love your hair! Can I touch it?

                1. What's your feeling about river-boat casinos? Do they really help your people, or are they just a short-term fix?
                "I AM BUT A MIST OF WATER IN A RAIN STORM""FOR I HAVE MUCH TO LEARN."

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by storm
                  Old man is sitting on his front porch without his leggings on. His nephew walks by and says "Uncle, what are you doing sitting out here without your pants on?" old man says.."Last week I sat out here without no shirt, gotta stiff neck"......."ayyy

                  :p :) :Chatter omg it took me awhile to get that i had to read it like 3 times haha

                  You got me lifted shifted higher than a ceiling And ooh wee it's the ultimate feeling
                  You got me lifted feeling so gifted Sugar how you get so fly?¿?


                  ****Mary had a little lamb but grandma butchered it****

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Not really White....

                    A man boards an airplane, and takes his seat. As he settles in,
                    he glances up and sees the most beautiful woman he has ever seenboarding the plane.

                    He soon realizes she is heading straight towards his seat. A waveof nervous anticipation washes over him. Lo and behold, she takes theseat right beside his. Eager to strike up a conversation, he blurts out, "So where are you flying to today?"

                    She turns and smiles, and says, "To the annual nymphomaniac Convention,in Chicago." He swallows hard, and is instantly CRAZED with excitement.Here's the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen, sitting RIGHT next to him, and she's going to a meeting of nymphomaniacs. Struggling to maintain his outward cool, he calmly asks, "And what's your role at this
                    convention?"

                    She flips her hair back, turns to him, locks onto his eyes, and says, "Well, I try to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality. "Really" he says, swallowing hard. "And what myths are those?"


                    She explains: "Well, one popular myth is that African American men are the most well endowed when, in fact, it is the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess this trait. Another popular myth is that Frenchmen are the best lovers, when actually it is men of Jewish descent who romance
                    women best, on average."

                    "Very interesting," the man responds. Suddenly, the woman becomes very embarrassed and blushes. "I'm sorry," she says, "I feel so awkward discussing this with you and I don't even know your name."

                    The man extends his hand and replies, "Tonto. Tonto Goldberg!"

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Not really White....

                      A man boards an airplane, and takes his seat. As he settles in, he glances up and sees the most beautiful woman he has ever seenboarding the plane. He soon realizes she is heading straight towards his seat. A wave of nervous anticipation washes over him. Lo and behold, she takes theseat right beside his. Eager to strike up a conversation, he blurts out, "So where are you flying to today?"

                      She turns and smiles, and says, "To the annual nymphomaniac Convention,in Chicago." He swallows hard, and is instantly CRAZED with excitement.Here's the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen, sitting RIGHT next to him, and she's going to a meeting of nymphomaniacs. Struggling to maintain his outward cool, he calmly asks, "And what's your role at this
                      convention?"

                      She flips her hair back, turns to him, locks onto his eyes, and says, "Well, I try to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality. "Really" he says, swallowing hard. "And what myths are those?"


                      She explains: "Well, one popular myth is that African American men are the most well endowed when, in fact, it is the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess this trait. Another popular myth is that Frenchmen are the best lovers, when actually it is men of Jewish descent who romance women best, on average."

                      "Very interesting," the man responds. Suddenly, the woman becomes very embarrassed and blushes. "I'm sorry," she says, "I feel so awkward discussing this with you and I don't even know your name."

                      The man extends his hand and replies, "Tonto. Tonto Goldberg!"

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Laughter is good medicine and I've read the jokes in this forum and got a good But what's funny to me is how Indian people joke about meeting people that say, "My great grandmother was a Cherokee Indian princess!"

                        I live in Eastern, North Carolina and I'm a writer. I've written books regarding my North American Indian heritage and whenever I meet people on the street, the first thing they say to me is, "My great grandmother was full blood Cherokee!" It never fails. Honest! The person can be either black or white but that is always the first thing they say. Or they'll ask me, "What kind of Indian are you, Cherokee?" I know that there are lots of people with a Cherokee heritage but why is that the first thing they say? Even when I talk with people over the phone and we get on the Indian subject they'll say, "My great grandmother was full blood Cherokee!" Why?
                        "Do not follow where the path may lead. Go instead where there is not a path and leave a trail."---Ralph Waldo Emerson

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by RainbowSpiriDancer View Post
                          Laughter is good medicine and I've read the jokes in this forum and got a good But what's funny to me is how Indian people joke about meeting people that say, "My great grandmother was a Cherokee Indian princess!"

                          I live in Eastern, North Carolina ...they'll say, "My great grandmother was full blood Cherokee!" Why?

                          Two Indian "SHORT" Joke about You Cherokee folks:
                          What is another name for Cherokee? generickee and another name? anglo!

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Stupidly comes to mind actually. I am Apache/Cree and have often been asked "are you Cherokee". And they do in fact say the "My great (or grand) or Mother was full blooded Cherokee" It may actually have something to do with the song "Cherokee Nation" I was never asked that question before that song became popular.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by T1hunder View Post
                              Stupidly comes to mind actually. I am Apache/Cree and have often been asked "are you Cherokee". And they do in fact say the "My great (or grand) or Mother was full blooded Cherokee" It may actually have something to do with the song "Cherokee Nation" I was never asked that question before that song became popular.

                              The song could be it but when people say that to me, I say to myself, "Don't they know any other groups of First Nation People?" But I try and tell them in a nice way that there are many other groups of First Nation People living in Eastern, North Carolina too. And I name some of the groups that lived and still live along the Roanoke River. And don't forget the next remark they make, "My grandmother had long, straight, hair down to here!" It's like, if you don't have long, straight hair, you're not Indian. Well, I don't have long straight hair. I have soft, curly, wavey hair that grows long but I keep it cut short. However, it's cold in these woods, so I'm letting it grow back.
                              "Do not follow where the path may lead. Go instead where there is not a path and leave a trail."---Ralph Waldo Emerson

                              Comment

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