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Paying the way to dance...

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  • Paying the way to dance...

    At what age do you feel is an appropriate time? We see parents bringing their toddlers out with keen outfits and lavish give-a-ways. Being generous is the way...yes...giving what you have and it comes from the heart! However, I have wondered if "paying their way" as a toddler is too early.

    My wife and I have discussed this several times over. Now that we are expecting (we're almost at the hump...no, not the baby bump) this question becomes more relevant to us.

    What are your thoughts?
    To get a true picture of your purpose in life, you only get the whole picture when you listen with your mind, your ears and your heart. This way The Creator has a direct connection with you and only you...no outside interference.

    When you follow the will of IT that created you, understanding that your purpose is not for you...but for IT and all that IT has created, there can be no wrong except failure to be obedient. Only then do we jeopardize the gifts we are given.

    Its not the final destination that defines us, rather the journey taken!

  • #2
    We have talked about this before sitting at a powwow watching a huge giveaway for a toddler
    I think if you want to bring them in when that young a small giveaway is more appropriate just to aknowledge the fact

    However when they are older (could be 5 or 15 up to them) and actually ready to dance a specific dance, dress them in those clothes and pay there way in!
    ᎠᏂᎩᏚᏩᎩ - Anigiduwagi
    Till I Die!

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    • #3
      I agree with Josiah

      We were talking about this issue at home just last night. I think it would depend on teh individual family. But usually when just a toddler they just have a small giveaway to get them out there. I have a youth group for Native kids in my community and our thinking is that we don't worry about it so much until they get older.... (around puberty) Our thinking is that most of these kids don't come from pow-wow families and they may need some time to really find the "style" or tehy may drop out altogether. Since we usually pay their way out of our own personal pockets, we don't want to go through that expense then just have them drop out in 6 months. Probably not the most traditional way to do things but is what we have to do due to personal finances.

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      • #4
        I don't see huge elaborate giveaways around here other then by the powwow committee. I don't think they need to be huge, they just need to be thanks and they need to be from the heart. When our kids do their big giveaway is when they become young adults. Rhey spend the year making their gifts. Not big as in expensive, but big as in time.I think when they get big money wise, it scares off those whose families struggle more.

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        • #5
          It just seems thats the time when you pay your way in, while your kiddos are little.
          Then they are taken care of forever and they can dance when they are ready and not have to wait on their parents to pay their way in.
          The only time its too late to start dancing is when you're dead.

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          • #6
            I joined my son in when he was 6 (26 years ago) and his daughter when she was 3. I wanted them to be on the dance floor and not have to worry about them not given that right or for people saying anything. So I brought my children out kind of early and have no regrets. In our way we giveaway all the time and we give from our hearts so when I had our giveaways, my family helped and threw in bundles of items and we had nice things in honor of our children. We gave away star quilts, pendletons, money for the drum and the one speaking for us, as well as for the people that we chose to bring them into the circle. Then we passed out things to all that were in attendance as far as our things would go as they were witnesses for this beautiful day which was in honor of our children.

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            • #7
              There is a lot discussion about this... and a lot of different ideas aobut what to give and when to do this....

              I always feel that gifts from the heart and within your means should be what you are giving away...If you are bringing your tiny one out for the first time then you need to have a give away. Like some of the others I think that it needs to be small, just to acknowledge the fact that your child has entered the circle and danced his or her first dance.

              If they come out later or come out in a specific type of dance then paying the way in means a more elaborate give away....
              Thankful for the blessing from the Creator in my life!!!!

              Life should not be measured by the number of things that we aquire on our journey but by the number of lives that we touch along that road.

              I am a bridge on the red path between my ancestors and the future. I am a bridge between my white heritage and my native heritage. A bridge joins two sides together and provides a way to move on..... A.K. O'Pry-Reynolds

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              • #8
                People do what they want when it comes to their own kids, some people don't even have giveaways or acknowledge to the people that their children are out there dancing.

                I know the way I was taught by my elders and thats to honor your loved ones no matter how young or old and to give what you can because life is precious. I can't say what is right for anyone else, I can only speak for my family. We honor our children and prepare for different aspects of our children's lives as they grow into adulthood. Joining into the powwow circle is only one of the giveaways and honorings that we have for our children. I won't go into any detail about the other giveaways or ceremonies.

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                • #9
                  My grandfather saw me out dancing and told my mom that I better have a give away. So, I don't even remember, I must have been 4-5 when that happened. I do remember a larger ceremony and a larger give away when they gave me feather at 8 years old. I think when they are small, to be acknowledged about being in the arena is a good thing. I think it's a personal call as to how large to make the give away.

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                  • #10
                    Wow.

                    Hi,

                    I am so gald to hear you guys are expecting.
                    It couldn't have happened to a nicer couple.

                    Sabrina

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                    • #11
                      This is something that recently came up in our home too.

                      I've been dancing since I was in diapers. My first giveaway was after my 'rights' (puberty). This is our way for the men, although I am not sure what to do about my daughters.


                      I do fear that my daughters will stop dancing for awhile (as many tween girls do) until they are older.

                      I never stopped dancing from 6-20, I think my boys will follow suit, so i personally think that waiting until after they're rights is perfectly okay...


                      but then again I'm at a loss for the girls, I figure I'll just let mom figure it out :)
                      AIM: GlacierESteffan
                      Yahoo: low_rdr
                      ICQ: 45338941
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